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Tuesday, March 3, 2009

?Mortgage Foreclosure Solutions: An Honest Guide

By Michael Geoffrey

People who are dealing with the issue of foreclosure are usually in need of some guidance in relation to mortgage foreclosure solutions. These solutions can help you keep your home and limit family problems related to foreclosure.

By now you have probably learned that running down the street screaming Oh my God they are taking my house! is not one of the effective or practical mortgage foreclosure solutions and that something a little more proactive is needed to fend off the bank.

Let me just say that blowing up the bank, while assuring you national television coverage, is also not one of the effective or practical mortgage foreclosure solutions that you can turn to. Just when it seems like your options are limited here I come with some of the best advice you will ever get and I am going to give it to you for free. Thats right! For free and you can thank me later!

One practical and effective solution to mortgage foreclosure is to use machine gun nests. This might not seem like a real solution, but it can be. Whenever someone comes to home with the intention of serving you with eviction papers, the machine gun nests will encourage them to turn around and leave you alone.

These machine guns do not have to be loaded or real. The idea is to scare off your foreclosure enforcing enemies. The power of fear can keep you in your home until the police decide to lock you up in jail for using the machine guns.

Open Up the Circus

Do you have a big back yard? Then have a circus and pay your mortgage from the admission proceeds! This solution is so simple it is hard to believe that more people are not employing it as one of their mortgage foreclosure solutions. All you need is a backyard at least the size of 3 football fields. Then you need a huge canvas tent big enough to accommodate a three ring circus and at least 5,000 spectators.

The next step is getting together the other things you will need for the circus. That means clowns, peanuts, popcorn, and elephants. Once you take care of that, the money will just start rolling in. This will require a bit of work, but it could be what saves you from losing your home. Opening a circus is a great idea because your neighbors are sure to love it and you will love the money you earn.

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